Saturday, October 15, 2016
Hi. This is to Trump supporters.
You dislike Hillary. You're not alone. I get it. But if you really hate Hillary, you need to hate Trump even more.
He stole your nomination and now he's giving the election to Hillary. Think about it.
If I was a strong Hillary supporter, I suppose I should say "Thank you." Because there probably isn't another person on the planet that could make people that were otherwise against Hillary, vote for her. For Trump's part, there probably isn't another democratic candidate either that would have enabled Trump to actually be a remotely viable candidate, to say nothing of actually leading in legitimate polls at one point.
This presidential election is the biggest mess in my lifetime. The whole thing smells of a rat.
John Oliver captured it best when he pointed out the parallels between Trump's situation and a 1996 children's book "The Kid Who Ran for President," where the kid ultimately gives a rant speech rebuking the electorate for voting him into office.
I have a question for the grown-ups of America ... Are you out of your minds? Are you expecting me to enforce the constitution? I never even read it. I was absent from school that day. Would you really want me as Commander In Chief of the armed forces? What if somebody attacked the United States? Would you really want me in charge? America must be in really bad shape if you elected me president. You better get it together and find some qualified people to run this country or we'll all be in big trouble.
And South Park's "Giant Douche vs Turd Sandwich" series has been brilliant.
Forgetting for a moment that, under a Trump presidency, the economy would crash like ...
... and he probably would start world war three.
... because then he actually has to run the country. And that means living in government housing, conversing with fully clothed women, and traveling in a plane that doesn't even have his name on it.
And South Park's version:
The second Mr. Garrison (The Giant Douche, Trump) realizes he has an actual shot at winning this election, he panics over his lack of a plan and starts self-sabotaging
2. The look on Hillary's face would be even better
If she lost this election, maybe she would finally give America the rant she thinks we deserve for not letting her have it in 2008 like we were supposed to.
Just when we thought things couldn't get worse this election season, we get the soul crushing catastrophe of the second debate.
It was a town hall format and the first audience question was about 'Modeling Appropriate Behavior For Today's Youth?'
This was on opportunity for Hillary. It was a softball she could have hit out of the park. But, predictably, she offered a classic non-answer of rambling campaign talking points. Imagine if, for once, she could have set the talking points aside and got real, along these lines:
"You're right. At times, the last debate could have been rated as MA, for mature audiences. And for my part, I apologize for that. There is no place for it in presidential debates, debates, we must remember, between people seeking the highest office in the land. We are supposed to be the adults here and when it takes the wisdom of children to tell us that we're acting like children, we should listen. I apologize and I promise to do a better job of showing how we, as civilized people, can have wildly differing positions and points of view and still maintain a level of quality discourse."
But robotic Hillary didn't do that. Instead, she didn't say a damned word to that question and just rattled off a laundry list of campaign positions. A swing and a miss.
Maybe there is such a thing as too much preparation.